I have just had a very powerful realisation I would like to share. Just as a plant needs to be repotted once it has outgrown its smaller pot I am needing to re-pot to bigger dwellings. The challenge is that at this present time I don’t have the finances to make such a leap. Having done all the affirmations, rituals and the like for abundance I am still plagued by ‘lack.’ I always have only Just Enough and so, despite never actually being in debt, I don’t have enough to move beyond.
Tonight I got to the bottom of why lack blocks my dreams coming true. Earlier in the evening Carlo and I decided to pull some tarot to help us to understand our feelings better about moving. My first card was Guilt. It took a while to understand it but finally after some prompting from Carlo I understood why I manifest lack rather than abundance.
Because I have always felt guilty about the huge divisions of wealth between people. In short I feel guilty to live in opulence when there are people all over the world living in extreme poverty. I have always had a deep connection with the planet and others. By the time I was nine I was raising money to help the feminine in Africa. I was born with it and hate to see the abuse and power we with money wield over others who do not have it. However, by the time I was fourteen I had lost hope that this world was going to change and that is one of the reasons why I tried to commit suicide when I was fourteen (for more information about this experience go to www.rebekahshaman.com/my book.
But now this guilt is no longer serving me because I can’t help without money so I have reached a divine paradox. I need the very thing that I detest so that I can help the people who don’t have it to get it.
So in order to fulfil my intentions and dreams I have to let go of one of my deepest core beliefs that money is the root of all evil. It is time to allow the abundance to flow in my life first to enable it to flow to others.
Oh wow!! It’s time to have some fun…..
Love and Blessings
Rebekah Shaman xxx
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Rebekah,
As you have been in the past for me a mirror… I was looking at your post tonight / this morning (as I can’t sleep)… I too have been looking at something similar. How can I do so well supporting and helping others find their wants, yet my deep internal wants are not “fully” recognized?
I recently was able to see through a wall to see my 14 year old step son sneak down the stairs, take the car keys and quietly go out the door. From my vantage point, physically this was not possible. And he was scared to death that I caught him out front.
(yes, I am using that to my advantage).
I did a reading from my guardian cards right after and those read similar. Why do I still question myself? Why do I really trust where it is important? My core belief that I need to let go of is that I am worth it. And that I don’t need to go through “exactly” what someone else has been through in order to help them.
Blessed be.
Kim
Comment by Kim — July 20, 2008 @ 5:19 am