Flo

Even from the title of her book “Eating Mangoes Naked”, you get the impression SARK will be sharing something inspiring and fun.  Her focus throughout the entire book is on pleasure. At the beginning of the book she says:

It is our birthright to enjoy ourselves and find all the pleasure in our lives.  Pleasure loves company and delights in being discovered.

Early in the book she discusses the pleasure we get by giving to others and challenges us to explore this aspect of ourselves.  Here is her list of questions related to how we give in our lives (the questions make good journaling prompts):

Are you able to give without an “credit”?

Do you feel compelled to give in honor of certain occasions even if you don’t want to?

Do you search for ways and reasons to give?

Is giving easy for you?

In what ways to you feel satisfied or dissatisfied with how others give to you?

Ways in which you welcome and fully embrace gifts, or not?

Share a story of a favorite time you gave to someone.

What can you offer to the world with your giving?

I like the last question and wonder what I can offer the world with my giving.  Sometimes I think just the act of approaching my day with an open heart is the best I can do (and some days, even that is a little challenging).

Namaste’

Flo

impossible
means
I’m possible
- SARK

It was in the 1990’s that I discovered SARK.  I madly started collecting her zany, creative  and inspirational books with titles like “Prosperity Pie”, “Succulent Wild Woman” and “Living Juicy”.  A visit to her website will give you a brief glimpse of her style and brightness.

I can remember receiving a newletter subscription and anticipated my monthly installment of inspiration and wisdom.  Reading treasures included stories about her travels, her cat, speaking engagements and friends. Her website now offers an e letter that seems to serve the same purpose, in a more technologically savvy way, while remaining highly creative and appealing (who else writes in crayon?!)

This month I’ll be sharing snippets of her wisdom.  I hope you get a chance to check out this wild woman’s approach to life.  It’s amazing.

Last night I watched portions of the premiere of “The Great American Dream vote”.  I was humored by what constituted the “great American dream” to the people on the show.  These 8 or so contestants were willing to stand in front of a studio audience and be televised across the U.S., stating their “great American dream” was a full head of hair, a daughter being in the Miss America or Miss Rodeo America pageants, creating America’s first ornamental chicken ranch, creating a basset hound retirement community and lastly, wanting one of the songs written for his wife, sung by a famous singer (a shoe-in for host, Donny Osmond).

While I have to say I do not like these types of shows and typically never watch them, I got roped in by the lack of Boston Legal and a preview that showed the basset hounds.

The thing that struck me is the variety of things people find important.  Important enough to state aloud.  Important enough to declare it would increase their happiness.  The participants did not choose gigantic, insurmountable dreams like world peace or solving world hunger.  They chose things that are important to them and things that would “make them happy.”

My vote goes to the basset retirement community (that AND world peace).

Namaste’,

Flo

In David Sedaris’ “Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim”, he writes about making a wish on the last bite of a piece of pie. The point of the pie. The story states you should eat your pie from the outside in, that “your last bite should be the point, and you’re supposed to make a wish on it.”

That’s news to me. My whole life I have been eating pie backward.

What I noticed about this idea is that I started thinking of all the opportunities we have created for making wishes. Falling stars. Birthday candles. Coins in a fountain or wishing well. We love to wish.

My wishes travel the galaxy – from wishing for homemade coconut creme pie to world peace. What is your most recent wish?

Flo

Following my declaration about honesty last week, I stopped blogging. No words would come out of my head. I lost my voice.

The question is “What is inhibiting me?” That’s what this is about. Suddenly there were mountains in front of me I couldn’t leap over (all made up in my head, of course). I felt rather vulnerable with lots of negative self talk – “who wants to read what you have to say” and “why are you doing this anyway?” It’s not so funny that all of this occurred following a conversation with a good friend about why I was blogging in the first place. I had explained that to me this is part of a bigger picture, part of my contribution to the world. I said I like being a part of a group “dedicated to helping people find more happiness”; it’s what I do in my daily-life-work and this broadens the opportunity to continue doing the same.

On Friday, when I explained to the same friend that I hadn’t written since our earlier talk and why, he asked what I was going to do about it. My response was “do it anyway” – keep barreling through the tunnel because that’s the only way to get through it. My feelings will eventually catch up and the negative self talk is quieting. I am still writing, just lagging a bit behind.

Flo

Terri Jentz, in her book “Strange Piece of Paradise” (an exceptionally well written book regarding a crime against her in 1977) – ends the acknowledgments portion of her book with a quote from late author and activist Paul Monette.  He told Jentz that each day “he would ask himself to write more honestly than he had the day before.”

I was struck strongly by this statement, this goal he set for himself and want to do the same for myself, for my writing and just how I live life. I think there is always more room for honesty in the world.

Namaste’

Flo

“Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.“

Abraham Lincoln (1809 – 1865)

Today I’m thinking about this comment by Abe Lincoln, stated over 100 years ago.  I notice that people are no different now, than then – seeking the feeling of happiness.

Why would we choose to be unhappy?  Do we do it consciously or do it while seeking the very thing we are looking for?  Michael frequently quotes Abraham, from Esther and Jerry Hicks’ book “Ask and it is Given”, which I ‘happen’ to be reading.  I am choosing to read this book more slowly than any book I’ve ever read in my life and will start over, reading it again when I’m finished.   The philosophy given feels that valuable to me.   The book repeatedly states that it’s important for us to realize that in seeking any emotional state, we may miss it entirely by focusing on the fact that it is missing from our lives.  When we focus on something we wish to have, it is natural to notice it’s absence yet where our focus lands is where we get to choose the absence or the presence of the thing we seek.

That’s the point I think Abe Lincoln is trying to make.  We have a choice to be happy…… or not to be.

We must always change, revew, rejuvenate ourselves; otherwise, we harden. 

-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

On any given day, it’s likely I’m in the midst of some self-evaluation process.  I search inside myself the endless list of things I’d like to change, improve or drop entirely and then, develop a gameplan for how-to-do one thing.  On some days, like last Saturday, the list became inevitably long.  I needed to overcome my paper-clutter issues, improve my marriage, create more positive self talk, and on and on.  As I said, the list was endless.  Being in such a state of introspection isn’t always good.  It can take my focus off the positive things in my life, as well as create an environment (in my brain, of course) where all I do and think about myself needs changed.  Fortunately, when I’m introspective, the thoughts are typically corraled into the “let’s see what I need to work on” part of myself and negative self talk is not part of this process.

So, how to address something I want to change?  I recently made a lengthy pro/con list when trying to make an important job decision.  This shed an enormous light on my reasons for wanting to make the move into private practice (vs. working a job and private practice).  The list gave me visual confirmation of what was going on in my mind and provided order and organization to the process.  The list became a validation tool.  There are other evaluation options such as sometimes it helps to get feedback from mentors, from friends, from family members who are insightful about you or the issue you want to change or create.  This was also a big help in my process and part of the pro/con list was created on the telephone with a co-worker, which provided an amazing amount of support and (again) validated my thought process. 

For today, focusing on the idea of change or improvement, I believe the first two steps are (1) identify what you want to change and (2) create a manner for evaluating the options (i.e. pro/con list, feedback from others) and I’ll continue this topic later.

 Flo

There are many things I should be doing today.  What am I doing instead?  Writing.  My other options sound rather dull to me.  Here’s the list:  Shovel snow from storm #2 (it kept me home today, but I don’t really feel the need to shovel it); write reports (can’t those be done later?); enter banking in the computer (this list is really starting to be a drag); and paint my office (it’s too cluttered for that right now).

I am full of excuses.  I probably always am. Let’s reframe that – I am full of reasons.   I probably always am.  Given the to-do list, which exceeds the above list by countless tasks, I have many reasons I’d rather write, rather rest, rather do any number of things than my list. Today, I’m doing the fun thing first, then I’ll tackle a task.  It’s like a game I play – two drudgery tasks then a fun thing or 4 hours of work, then a cross country ski.

Today, Rob Brezsny (Free Will Astrology) http://www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes/gemini.html  gives two tips for all the Gemini’s in the world in order to be inundated with love in 2007 (1) Make yourself supremely lovable; (2) increase your capacity to give love.  I think #2 is right on the money. It could probably apply to everyone, not just the Gemini’s out there.

Have you ever “practiced” a resignation letter?  It can be fun to do so because when practicing you can say every little, minute thing that you can never really say.  Things like: “Hasta’ lavista”,  “I’m outta’ here” and “adios amigos” (I’m sure there are other choice words out there that could be added to the list!)

In the last week, I have “practiced” my resignation letter many times and having verbalized it on Friday, I will be submitting it officially on Monday.  There is an endless amount of relief as well as other emotions that follow this letter.  My goal is to increase my happiness.  That may sound trite, but working 60 hours in a week doesn’t give me alot of time to do “fun” things that add to me being a well-rounded being.  I have been happy working two jobs; I believe in being happier.