Flo

Standing by the fountain at DIA - I found myself staring at family members as they greeted each other, and my smile got bigger and bigger as I watched.

One woman was making wild arching movements with her right arm.  A huge grin on her face, she was trying to get the attention of her husband and teenage son.  The son noticed, but in typical teenage style, said nothing.  She approached her husband from behind and startled him.  He blushed,  so happy to see her.  The teenager smiled wide as he hugged his mother.

Another woman was squatted down by the escalator (just a bit unusual for an airport).  A second later I heard “Mommy, Mommy” as a small blonde girl vaulted herself into her mother’s arms, followed by her equally tiny sister and a slightly harrassed father.  Their laughter was infectious.

In the next minute Kay start motioning to me.  Left?  Right?  I point right and we gallop  to meet, not having seen each other in over a year.  I love reunions.  The aniticipation, the emotions, the joy and laughter.

Namaste’

Flo

One year ago, I wrote http://cloud9000.com/flo/dear-future-self-remember-me/. This week, I have been receiving forgotten emails from me, dated the beginning of April 2007.  If nothing else, they are entertaining and make me laugh! 

Here’s a reminder: Futureme.org allows you to send an email to yourself, at a specific time in the future.  Tonight I wrote about Homer, Wally and Abby - just to remind me of what I am doing right-this-moment.  Sometimes, I forget to be in-the-moment and tonight I want to remember this feeling.

Namaste’

Yesterday, while sitting in a court room, watching the process of an adoption - I was proud to be part of “the village”.  Proud to be part of the support system that loves and embraces the family.

On such a momentus occasion, it was funny to watch the children - the parents were attentive and solemn, listening to the judge.  They agreed this is what they have always wanted and answered questions such as “what do you do for fun?” and “what do they like to eat?”.  At the beginning, the children sat on their parents’ laps, listening and participating as best they could.  Quite soon, the children were climbing under the bench to the bench behind them to join the other children.  The bench seemed alive with moving children - back and forth, up and down (benches are great for sliding, you know!)

The air itself seemed to vibrate with applause and laughter, hugs and happiness.  The parents feel blessed and the village found such joy in participating in the celebration of love.

Recently, on the CBS Evening News Morley Safer reported on “The Pursuit of Happiness.”  He quoted the main scientific survey on international happiness conducted by Leicester University in England, noting Denmark is the happiest country in the world with the U.S. ranking 23rd (above Iraq and Pakistan).  Many topics are discussed as to why the United States ranks so low and Denmark so high on the list.

Among others, Safer interviews Tal Ben-Shahar, who teaches Positive Psychology - the Science of Happiness at Harvard University about this study and about how American’s view happiness.

A 2006 NPR article also interviewed Ben-Shahar, who lists his six tips for happiness.  Although in the article his best advice is #4, it would do us all some good to consider this list, and figure out how we’d like to implement it daily.

 Flo

Last night, well really, early this morning, I woke myself up laughing out loud.

It’s such a funny thing to do.  Having never done this before, I want to do it again - like when you turn in a circle, round and round, until you’re dizzy and fall down, only to jump up and do it again and again.   I want to wake up because I’ve laughed so hard in my dream that I’m laughing for real.  In the dream, I had the giggles and couldn’t quit laughing.  I had already wakened two other times and this time, I just lay there, really appreciating I could wake up this way.

It seems on most days, I can easily create a list of all I’ve done, accomplished and achieved.   And typically, if I need to do that, my planner does it for me. Weekends, I prefer no listing on my Treo, and I resort to pieces of paper, Post-its, stuck on the end of the granite bar.  In reality, I’d like to get through my weekend without a list, without my brain saying “snow tires*pedicure*Target*Sunflower Market-> you really didn’t do much today” as if I need to measure*validate*prove how I spend my weekend time.  Today I created the “list”, hoping I’d have a little focus and not spend the entire day watching movies.  I did about 1/2 the list and many little things that didn’t make it on the list - rakes and shovels from the summer to and in the shed, tires to the barn, and my favorite, feed apples to the neighbor’s horses and miniature donkey.  This donkey is a funny creature, coming to the fence to ensure receiving apples she can’t eat in one bite.  She takes a bite, chews, then takes another bite.  Polite-like.  Meanwhile, the two not-so-polite horses come over to steal her apple.  This little miniature donkey is white with brown spots and the first time the white horse came to steal her apple, she turned around and kicked at his face, both back legs high in the air.  She’d show him. Unfortunately, the height of her back legs, full extension, is lower than his head and she lost her apple.  I ran back home, cut up another apple into pieces her size, hurdled the fence and hand fed them to her, while I was nudged on the backside by her sorrel pen-mate (I don’t really know if she’s “sorrel” or not, but I do know that’s a word indicating a horse color and I think it’s brown!). 

This is what really mattered in my day.  Not the laundry, the conference registration, the vacuuming or the research on HP portable printers - what really mattered, was the fresh air and feeling those little donkey lips (are they called “lips” on a donkey?) touching my palm as she nuzzled around for bits of apple.

There are days I’d rather be somewhere else than where I am.  Don’t get me wrong - I’m fully aware I’ve chosen to be here and could choose to be elsewhere, just as well.  Today it’s a sense of overwhelmedness that hit me and makes me want to escape.

Where would I rather be?  Kailua sounds rather nice right this moment.  It’s 4:30 there, a good time to jump in the green kayak and paddle out to Flat Island where the kayak is banked on a little sandbar and most of this tiny island is a sanctuary for Shearwater birds. http://www.pbase.com/afrogie/image/84317480  As you walk around the island (at a slow pace it takes 15 minutes), you might notice eggs laying on the ground cover and shrubbery or see birds dive bombing and disappearing into holes in the rocks.  Depending on the tide, you may be able to dig in the little sand pit or watch the waves crash into the natural arch - a small arch, quite excellent for those younger that 5 or adults who want to sit and watch.  Through the arch, when the waves receed you could glimpse a surfer or longboarder, enjoying the waves created off this small islan,. while the sun feels warm on your back.

Yes, sometimes I go there in my mind.

The sun sneaks around this morning, rays landing on only a section of the tree leaves and of lawn as it comes through the clouds.  It disappears and it looks like we got lots of rain last night.

The rain smells like it cleans the earth - waters the flowers and the vegetable garden, that is giving an overabundance of vegetables at the moment.  In my mind, I see myself walking the neighborhood this weekend, trying to pawn off, blatantly hand out the vegetables to strangers so they don’t go to waste.  I could set up a card table and cardboard sign at the end of the driveway, like an old fashioned lemonade stand.  I’m a sucker for lemonade stands - giving my money away for a watered-down version of something that tastes faintly of lemon and sugar, mostly of just water.  I support the concepts of children earning and managing money; of having something to drink when I walked the gardens of Fort Collins earlier this summer.  It’s a throw-back to the 60s and 70s and reminds me of old Kool-aid commercials.  I was the kid who mailed in kool-aid packages for my free backpack and canteen!

Reading the July 11-17, 2007 Fort Collins Weekly ,I perused Rob Brezsny’s Free Will Astrology.  I’ve written before on his writings about the Gemini that inhabits my being and enjoyed his latest findings:

The German work selig can mean both “ecstatic” or “blessed”.  It implies that profound bliss can be a devine gift; that deep pleasure may generate or come from spiritual inspiration.  The English language doesn’t have a term comparable to selig, maybe because our culture regards ecstasy with suspicion.  Religious people tend to believe that the blessed are those who are good and kind, certainly not those who are skilled at cultivating esctatic states.  People who worship rationality, on the other hand, like intellectuals and scientists, often think of ecstacy as at best an irrelevant state, and at worst a nonproductive or deluded indulgence.  Personally, I’m in alignment with the values embodied by the word selig.  It happens to be your specialty this week.

May your day be ecstatic or blessed or, in the best case, both!

Today I am reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat Pray Love” and I’ve decided she is a woman after my own heart.  Not only does she describe herself as eating her way through Italy (similar to my recent experience in Seattle, Washington) but she talks about her meditation struggles in a manner I understand and are quite descriptive of how my mind operates.

“Like most humanoids, I am burdened with what the Buddhists call  the “monkey mind” - the thoughts that swing from limb to limb, stopping only to scratch themselves, spit and howl.  From the distant past to the unknowable future, my mind swings wildly through time, touching on dozens of ideas a minute, unharnessed and undisciplined.  This in itself is not necessarily a problem; the problem is the emotional attachment that goes along with the thinking.  Happy thoughts make me happy, but - whoop! - how quickly I swing again into obsessive worry, blowing the mood; and then it’s the remembrance of an angry moment and I start to get hot and pissed off all over again;  and then my mind decides it might be a good time to start feeling sorry for itself, and loneliness follows promptly.  You are, after all, what you think.  Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions.”

If you get a chance to read this book, I’d recommend it.